The two lovebirds walked hand in hand as the sun began to set on the beach. The waves of the ocean gently met their feet on the sand as the salty air reminded them that their refreshing beach vacation would soon be coming to a close. After over two years of blissful serenity, their relationship felt very “natural.” The couple had the freedom to completely be themselves, unaffected by the outside world. The relationship was heaven on earth, with of course, the occasional bump in the road. This is not to say that their relationship was perfect; it was indeed “work,” and required compromise and communication to be happy and fulfilling for both of them.
I’m not sure that you can ever have too many discussions about love. The subject of love is always around us; it’s on television shows, in film, it’s depicted in commercials, in music, poetry, art, and just about every communications-related medium. You may consider checking out my investigative discovery, “The Love Lesson,” http://justcierra.blogspot.com/2009/11/love-lesson.html in which I attempted to understand the true meaning of love.
The theme of love is a universal theme that connects everyone from around the world. It doesn’t discriminate against race/ethnicity, country or cultural lifestyle, sexual orientation, age, or physical condition. Whether you live in a small village in the tropics of Malaysia, or are a gay man living in New York City, or a lesbian woman living in Canada, or are a disabled man living in southern Panama. It seems as if everyone wants to be in love, or perhaps is socialized to long for the romance of being in a loving and committed relationship.
Now for my social love question, drum roll, please—do you think that falling in love is a choice? Or is it by chance that we fall in love?
I imagine many will have fairly strong opinions on the answer to this question. I actually think that most people believe that falling in love is not a choice. I would guesstimate that probably more than 1/2 of people will think that falling in love is not a choice. What do you think?
My perspective is slightly different than most when it comes to the question of whether or not falling in love is a choice. I believe that falling in love, is indeed a choice. I think it is a decision, whether it is conscious or subconscious (depending on the person), to fall in love. At some point in the process of dating, courting, or getting to know someone you decide whether or not you are going to allow your heart to be open to the possibility of sincerely loving the other person.
Will you allow yourself to trust another person with your mind, body, and spirit? Will you allow yourself to love without fear of hurt or restraint? Or will you choose to be conservative with your heart due to the fear of vulnerability or potential hurt? It is a choice to decide to embark upon the journey of love with another person as one moves through the many stages of dating.
Having said this, on the other hand, I don’t think that who you fall in love with, is a choice. I don’t think you can help who comes and "steals your heart." Whether they are tall or short, thin or chubby, black or white, of Latin or Asian ancestry, or what their religion, occupation, financial, or other circumstances are. I don’t think that physical, mental, or emotional attraction towards another individual is a choice. I think great deals of these factors are chance related. It is by chance that your paths cross with this particular person at that particular time in life, and that you happen to be compatible with each other.
So, could it be that by chance we are able to meet and find the right person and by choice that we allow our hearts to be open to the possibility of loving another person, and ultimately fall in love? Or is the other way around? What do you think? Is falling in love a game of choice or a game of chance?
A Note to the Reader: I want to hear your thoughts on this question! “Is falling in love a game of choice or a game of chance?” Even if it’s just one or two words, sentences, phrases, or paragraphs! Whatever you’re willing to share, will be most helpful as I seek to create open, honest dialogue about real life social issues! Ready, set, discuss!!
