Isn't love, dating, and the whole relationship process a lot like playing the lottery? It's as if, relationships are in many ways a gamble, especially in today's day and age of having such high rates of broken relationships and divorce.
Many of us start "gambling" around the age of 15 or 16, hoping to strike it rich, someday! We don't really know if we'll hit the "jackpot" (translation: "get married") to that one special person, however, most of us are definitely hoping for it.
Ok, let's stop and really think about this for a minute. Around 15 years old (give or take a couple of years, depending on what planet you come from), you start dating, or shall I say "gambling." People date and date and date. It's no wonder it's such a chore to find anything resembling a healthy relationship these days. Yeah, we learn lots of lessons along the way. But, let's face it, at this point you're still gambling, which means you've also lost a lot of money along the way too!
People (both men and women) gamble all of this money hoping to win the jackpot! So, what happens, when you're really close to winning? I mean really close!
Jackpot! You find this wondrously amazing partner that you absolutely cannot live without! She wakes up extra early to make you the most deliciously delightful breakfast in bed. He'll drive all the way across town to bring you a movie and your favorite ice cream just to cheer you up. She helps him with his business plans for work. He gives her advice with her miscellaneous work-related projects. Even on top of all that, their energy and connection with each other is one of a kind. Everything just fits.
Except, one thing's off with your relationship. (Of course, there has to be a problem, right?!) It's simply a matter of timing. One person's ready to be in a committed relationship and the other wants to take their time. One person's ready to be married and the other is feeling like in about 2-3 years, they’ll be ready to journey down the aisle.
Does one continue to gamble on the jackpot? Or do you play it safe and walk away from the gambling table?
The great thing about playing the lottery is that you can always play a completely different game, and get completely different results. So, maybe playing the “Mega Millions” jackpot is proving to be too time consuming. One can always play the “Fantasy Five.” The only difference is the “Mega Millions” game is worth $100 million and the “Fantasy Five” is worth an estimated $526,000.
The “Fantasy Five” game is a completely different relationship all together. The relationship is good, nice, and comfortable. In fact, it’s very easy. Within a matter of months, you’ve hit the “Fantasy Five” jackpot! Now, is just a matter of cashing in! You’ve even set a date to claim your prize. (Translation: You’ve set a wedding date.)
The timing is perfect for both you and your partner. You and your partner want exactly the same things. You’re both in the same stage of life and are ready for a serious commitment. Marriage, anyone? Ready, set, yes! Both partners value familial relationships and look forward to building those ideals with someone. Everything’s perfect, especially the timing. On the contrary, there’s just one thing missing. (Of course, it’s always something!)
The “it” factor is missing. You know, that extraordinary cosmic connection that is completely indescribable that is uniquely exceptional that is unlike anything you’ve ever encountered in your entire lifetime! As Betty and Veronica would say in an Archie comic book, that incredibly marvelous “va-va-voom” is what’s absent from your new relationship. Okay, so maybe that’s all a little overboard, but you get my drift!
So, what’s a person to do? Does one cash in on the easy, already won “Fantasy Five” game for $526,000? Or does one attempt to go back and play the “Mega Millions” lottery, which is now at an estimated $142 million? Obviously, one is a substantially higher risk, with a bigger payoff versus a modest payoff and a guaranteed bet.
I guess the bigger question here is: do you aspire to live with a lump sum payment of $526,000 versus trying to achieve the $142 million lottery? And, let’s not forget about taxes! Uncle Sam always comes for his! (Translation: Taxes are those unknown, inevitable “downfalls” or things in a relationship that you had no idea existed that are not good or welcoming that take away from your relationship. Nobody’s a perfect fit.) Hence, everybody has to pay taxes on a relationship.
There really is no "right" or "wrong" answer. I guess it just boils down to what's most important to you and which would make you genuinely happier. Decisions, decisions, decisions, what would you do?
Love, life, and the lottery!
